Friday, November 25, 2005

Wonderful Laughter and Conflicting Feelings

I think that when I reflect on most of the holidays and the time spent with family, the random fits of laughter are the most memorable moments for me. Right before we went up to Rocklin for Thanksgiving, my family came by to visit, and they brought my beautiful nephew, Benjamin. Ben gives me hope for one day having children. He is a breath of fresh air compared to the children in our complex, who run around screaming and unsupervised the majority of the time. It was a complete joy to spend time with him, and to see the rest of the fam.

Thanksgiving was wonderful as always, with way too much food for our needs. I have a hard time sometimes, looking at all the food we eat and prepare on this day, and then thinking of the millions of people out there who do not have food to eat on a daily basis. The very thoughts can sometimes be overwhelming to the point of feeling inadequate and powerless to all the world's problems and pains. This brings me back to some of the discussions I have had with classes on the amount of news and tragedy we hear about on a daily basis. I think there is only so much our minds can handle, and when we continue to be bombarded with images of pain and oppression, we are sometimes forced into apathy and non-action.

The weather here has been rainy and windy, a nice change from the 80 degree days in Pasadena. Tonight I will be joining Shan and her parents at a wedding for an old highschool friend. Basically, I will be on display, and I will need to answer tons of questions from people I don't know. I am happy to go and be with Shan and her fam, but the idea of answering tons of questions leaves me tired already.

I haven't been to vocal about the Buy Nothing Day, but it has been hard a few times. I just don't think people even blink an eye at the amount of money we spend on a day like today, especially on crap we have been told we need by companies and their advertising. But it really is a way of life that needs to shift, and I am definitely not there yet. So, who am I to judge? I am no one, and I can only control what I do and how I live. So, maybe today will be a buy nothing day in conjunction with judge no one day. We shall see.

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